[P]: Hello everyone. I am honoured to have with me today Mr Charles Bukowski, eminent author and poet. I’d like to ask you about your novel Factotum, your second work I believe. Firstly, if you don’t mind, will you try and sum it up for those who have not yet encountered it?
[P]: Haha, very succinct, Charles; and spot on, I must say. But a lot of your work deals with alcohol consumption, so how does Factotum differ from your other novels?
[P]: I can’t argue with that, Mr Bukowski; there are definitely tits in Factotum. I’m interested, actually, in the portrayal of women in the book. You are often accused of misogyny; what would you say to those people who, after reading Factotum, might complain that you write about women in an entirely negative way?
[P]: Is that the women in your book or the people who complain about the way that you write about women?
[P]: Ok. One of the most interesting aspects of your work is, for me, the focus on working class life. Your protagonist, Chinaski, drifts from one menial job to another. I expect that you have something meaningful to say about the dispossessed, the downtrodden, the people with the lowest status in our society. What are your thoughts, Charles?
[P]: Oh, indeed. Well, that concludes our interview Mr Bukowski. I’d just like to say, before we part, that there is a scene in your book where Chinaski is forced to receive a blowjob from a woman that he is entirely unattracted to; and there is a line in the text, which I think is perhaps your best, which is something like, If I come I will never forgive myself. That made me laugh so much, Charles; and I’d like to thank you for that one moment of mirth, because laughter is precious, even though the rest of your book made me want to take a stiletto heel to my eyes. Thank you for talking to me, Charles Bukowski.